My 35th Birthday is coming!

25 Jan

I think sometime in my late 20’s I began to really enjoy my birthday, I think that it had something to do with the fact that it was right around that time that I felt the best in my own skin. I began to enjoy being myself, and have enjoyed perfecting that every year. It feels really good to live. Now, 35, for some reason it’s the first time that I feel a sense of dread? is that the word? not quite sure. I’ve never put much stock in numbers but for some reason 35 resonates. So, I ask you, those who stumble upon this post, or my dear podcast listeners, or those who for whatever reason find what I write here in my little site (home away from home) interesting, to let me know what you think. What does 35 mean? For those of you who are younger, what do you think 35 may mean to you or does mean to you? What about those who are older than 35, what was turning 35 like for you? Was this specific birthday ‘important’ in some way? I’m really just asking for myself.

I think that if one were to guess my age, 35 wouldn’t really be the age that was guessed. I have a bit of a younger type of energy. But still, what does that mean? What is a younger energy? and does it really matter?

Yes, I am pensative right now.

I want some feedback, really. One of my new friends, Nick, just put up a post called, are you a lurker? Now, a lurker is a person who happens to read all the stuff that is written in various different sites but doesn’t participate, meaning comment. I would like to put out a special call to all my own special lurkers, all of those who read and participate in my podcasts but happen to have stayed in the background, to comment on this one. I only put you guys on the spot cause I have a feeling your insight is what I’m looking for πŸ™‚ Now, those of you who have posted in the past, please feel free to also participate, as I love to hear from you guys no matter what.

Just a thought. Walk on the wild side lurkers, and share some 35th Birthday stories, thoughts, ideas with me. Inspiration is needed!

by the way…my birthday is on February 6….just for your info…..I still can’t hide it, gotta celebrate πŸ˜‰


10 Responses to “My 35th Birthday is coming!”

  1. t January 25, 2007 at 5:04 pm #

    As one of your “lurkers” I decided that I would reply today, seeing as it is almost your birthday and I am a firm believer in birthday presents πŸ™‚

    I’m a 22 year old woman and I am very jealous of women in their 30s. Every time I meet a woman in her 30s she seems so happy and grounded. I have this fantasy that on my 30th birthday a switch in my head is going to magically click and all those buzzing insecurities up there will be turned off. I know, however, that it’s not like that. I think that what is so special about women in their 30s is that they lived through their 20s. The 20s are this time of doubt and confusion. I could be anybody right now, but will I ever really be me? It’s such a daunting time. I look to women like you (and you literally, through this blog) to inspire me to be more and do more. 35 is such a great age, because you have so much to share, yet still so much to learn πŸ™‚

    So my thoughts on why 35 is a little scary. Well, 35 is almost 40, and 40 – what is that? As a kid I can remember thinking: “At 40, you’re old.” When I see my mother today at 50 years old, she doesn’t look “old” to me. I met my uncle’s brother on New Year’s Eve and he was 74. Believe me, that is not what I imagined 74 looked like when I was younger. People seem to be getting older, but to me the faces with those numbers seem to be getting younger. Or maybe I’m just getting older…

    Each year when our number goes up, we’re bound to feel something: entitlement, excitement, (and as we get older) dread. I hate to see anyone dread their birthday though. It’s such a wonderful to time to celebrate being alive and how wonderful of a person you are. Those things don’t diminish as we get older – they grow!

    I hope this is helpful.

    Happy birthday!

  2. joni January 25, 2007 at 5:08 pm #

    hi elsie!
    35 was a turning point in my life — it was when i realized that i finally had hit middle age.
    i had two kids by then and decided that i would devote all my time and attention (and money) to caring for and raising two. and no more than two (or i’d REALLY be in the poorhouse by now!)
    35 is when i realized that i couldn’t ignore all the gray that was appearing on my head — so that’s when the bottle of brown hair dye became my friend πŸ™‚
    35 is when i started skiing. and despite my initial balance issues (which probably explains why tree pose can be difficult for me at times), it became something i looked forward to doing every year, as often as possible.
    35 is also when i ran my first marathon. i didn’t train for it as religiously as i should have because the skiing got in the way (see above), but i eventually ran many more after it (40+ and counting!) and plan to keep running them as long as my knees and back let me.
    in short, life as i know it today started when i was 35. and i love it!!

    so have a happy birthday on the 6th, elsie, and i hope to see you at lulu on the 18th!

  3. Elsie January 25, 2007 at 6:19 pm #

    Thank you guys! You know, I’m so constantly amazed by what sharing can do for one’s soul. Words and feelings from the heart, as simple as they may seem can really inspire. Gotta tell you with your comments my usual excitement about my birthday is growing! I gotta say T, that I wouldn’t want to go back to my 20’s. I agree with you about feeling insecure during that time. I kinda second guessed myself almost in every one of my preferences: food I liked, music, boys, movies, religion, etc. I think the biggest amount of growth I did in my 20’s was from 26 on. For whatever reason I found my ground, and began to nourish my ‘voice.’ My ‘voice’ didn’t belt out of me until 30, man did I enjoy that! I felt so powerful! Now, coming onto the mid point of my 30’s adhering to growth and to continue to remain steady to our Grace filled lives is more challenging. Joni, you have shown me that once again, you can do MORE! And continue to be fantastic at it. It’s never really going to be easy, I know that , but knowing that whenever my light dims even just slightly you can have someone (lurkers, friends, strangers) share a little of their own essence (sparkle, juice, sap) and TAAAADAAAAA! Magic! We bloom together. I want more more more! Get in the conversation all!!! Thank you guys πŸ™‚

  4. hillary January 26, 2007 at 12:54 am #

    35!!!! – Well, I could list 35 reasons that I am grateful for you Elsie, but I will offer my soon to be 35 instead. Cheers to a great year, what a treat to share this amazing year with you. For me turning 35 is a major accomplishment to see all I have done and now have a foundation to express myself more without a blink of care of what others think (not that this is your case). Wisdom is earned and savored making 35 the perfect time to really blossom as a woman. (cool enough Hollywood is looking for woman in their 30s now not the aunjanue) Our 20’s are for messing up and not really claiming ourselves but our 30’s we actually can exhale and see who we are, I imagine 40’s you really can sit back and live with grace without saying a word. At 25 I thought I new it all at almost 35 I know can steep in my humility and say that I don’t. A gift. If we allow society, advertising and any outside influences to define us then we forgot the yoga. But if it does tip us off the path its only a sweet reminder to jump in with our light and share it at the many levels that we know have inside. There are as many people as there are ways to be 35 so be your 35 even if that looks like a teenager in a womans body….. I bless you dear and compliment you for the amazing work you have done as you have touched many hearts and will only have more to offer as the years reveal the colors that have yet to come from you. HAPPY BIRTHDAY regardless of the year!!!! xo Hillary

  5. Elsie January 26, 2007 at 5:46 am #

    I love you Hill! Can’t wait for your 35th! How fun is this, it all happens in the same year! Whoooopee! Thank you for taking the time to share. I talked about you in class today πŸ™‚ It was necessary.

  6. Mel January 26, 2007 at 6:50 am #

    I feel like I’m cheating since I didn’t even know about this entry until class today…
    So, you’ve reached your “scary age.” Everyone has that birthday where it’s pending arrival gives you knots in your stomach. For some reason, mine was 28. Then I turned 28 this year and realized how not important the number is. I thought of some of my best friends who are older than me by a few years or by decades and realized how unafraid I should be of getting older – that who I am today will not diminish as time goes on, but will continue on, hopefully as a better version. I don’t know how much I can speak to the age of 35 specifically, but in regards to age and the passing of time… I like how being older just opens up your exposure to the world and the people around you. Stories that you heard when you were younger, whether they were about your family, or about history in general, usually went right over your head because it was about “grown-ups” who were “so old.” Then you hear those stories again when you’re older, and you’re amazed, because your mom sold her radio just so that she could have $50 dollars in her pocket when she came to America, and she was only 23 at the time, and then you think back to how young that is and how lucky and spoiled you were when you were 23… But you’re only able recognize and appreciate those things with time. To me getting older is gift itself – it allows you to unwrap everything you thought you knew and look at it in a completely different light. And it’s exciting to know that you still have so many more gifts to open.
    So Happy (upcoming) Birthday Elsie. I look forward to keep on learning from you, whether they be yoga poses, or small words of wisdom that bounce around my head long after a class ends. In the meantime, look ahead to your coconuts and legwarmers birthday extravaganza and remember to keep your heart open…

  7. radiantfire January 27, 2007 at 12:46 am #

    Silly Birthday Poems
    Ode to 25…

    the shivering glitter
    reminds itself
    it’s OK to sparkle

    Ode to 35…

    your sparkle realizes
    it is part of a glowing
    butterfly’s wing…

    happy birthday dear elsie.
    here is a song that my art of living friends like to sing:

    today is the day
    the wave remembers
    the ocean where it was born
    and today is the day
    we all remember
    this world is our very own
    happy birthday to you
    we belong to you
    happy birthday
    dear elsie
    you are our very own…
    yes, you are our very own…

  8. Steve January 27, 2007 at 1:17 am #

    Hi Elsie,
    I too am turning the big 35 this year (but not until Thanksgiving weekend). I can relate to what you’ve said. I feel a lot more at ease in my own skin than I did in my twenties: more myself, more indifferent to what other people think of me, a lot less preoccupied with where I “should” be, more able to embrace the unknown. This past year I’ve felt immensely appreciative for the vastness and funkiness of my life and even said to a friend that I feel like my life is now as unique as my thumb print. What really took me by surprise was one day realizing that I wouldn’t change my past if I could. The major hurts and upsets (and there have been some hardcore ones) have defined who I am and I have no desire to change that person.

    I’m a little weirded out about 35. We’ve been imagining what these numbers would be like when they arrive since we were teenagers. I said I’m less preoccupied with where I should be, not that I don’t think about it all. These birthdays in my thirties have a tendency to dredge that up, but I’ve gotten better at dismissing those self-judgements as a waste of time. My glass is half full, and it’s full of tasty red wine. And the rest of the bottle is just sitting there, decanting, waiting for me.

  9. Danielle(lil yogini) January 27, 2007 at 4:42 am #

    Hiii Elsie!! One of my best friends told me that 35 was the best age for her. And, as a 16 year old, I’m really looking forward to turning 35. Because, to me, 35 represents a time when I will (hopefully by then,lol) have developed my own individuality. (Am I saying this right?) What I mean to say is that, by then, instead of being what everyone expects me to be now, I can be what I want to be, and how I want to be. I’ll have enough experience to do certain things, but I’ll enjoy learning more in the process.
    I don’t consider 35 to be ‘old’, because some of my friends are 35+, and they’ll get mad, teehehe. No, honestly, I learn more from my friends, young and old-er, everyday. And hopefully when I’m their age, I’ll be just as intelligent and caring as them.

    So, to me, 35 is almost the perfect age; it’s when life starts to bloom, almost like a flower when it starts to mature.

  10. Steve January 27, 2007 at 6:00 am #

    Instead of “tasty red wine” I wish I’d said “bold red wine.” That would have been so much cooler.

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